Sunday, March 05, 2006

The post in which I will undoubtably come across as bitter, when really it should be read as cynical and possibly resigned

It is becoming increasingly clear to me that I need to start nurturing an affinity for cats. Many, many cats. For, you see, it is becoming equally clear to me that I am destined for spinsterhood, and, as we all know, the spinsters, they like their cats.

I think I need to look into a proper spinster wardrobe as well. What are the crazy spinsters wearing these days? Sensible shoes? I have those. Cardigans? Well, I have some but I can easily knit some more. Glasses? Check. Anything else? I probably need to find a supplier of sensible slacks with pleats in the front. And slash pockets. I will also need to learn to tuck tissues into my sleeves for ready access and possibly I should find a chain for my glasses, even though I won't technically need it, since the glasses are not just for reading.

What else will I need in order to truly make the transition from single woman in her 30’s to crazy spinster lady? I already knit, so that’s one thing out of the way. I think that cat thing will be the most problematic. (and the pleat-front slacks, but I can probably work my way around that).

What brings on this spinsterhood preparation? The usual: I just found out that a guy I had dated briefly had been, well, less than 100% truthful with me (which, deep down, I knew) and not only that, but he's getting married soon. Whereas I spend most days/evenings at home alone with my knitting and my TV. It really is a shame that I can't stand cats.

My friend (who, bless her heart wanted to go find this guy and hit him)("bless her heart", see, I'm picking up the spinster slang already)(I would have loved to see her go after him. She's about 5'2" and he's probably 6'2")

Where was I? Oh, yeah. My friend and I were joking about the fact that almost any guy who has ever taken me out on a date has soon after either gotten back together with his ex or has met the woman that he ends up marrying. (Actually, several times they met the girl while we were seeing each other. Once, the guy met the girl while we were on a date.) We were saying that I should start a dating service: Take me out to a movie and/or dinner and you will find your soul-mate. It won't be me, but you will find your soul-mate.

So, now I'm at home, alone, knitting and watching hockey and trying to work my head around the fact that I need to start collecting cats soonish if I'm going to qualify as a crazy old spinster lady. Is there some sort of committee that I need to apply to in order to be certified as a crazy old spinster lady?

Saturday, March 04, 2006

80's Teen Movies

Pretty in Pink is on TV. This movie instantly takes me back to High School. (also: Some Kind of Wonderful, Sixteen Candles et al)

The thing about these movies was that they gave HOPE to the quirky, wierd, misfits. The heriones of these movies were NOT the rich girls, or the popular girls, or the really well adjusted girls. They were creative, individual, strong, but not like everyone else. They all got the guy. The guy who was Popular, Cool, Handsome, and often Rich. (well, except in Some Kind of Wonderful. In that one the GUY was wierd and creative and he almost got the Rich Popular girl but then the wierd misfit girl got the wierd misfit guy and ... never mind. Take that one off the list. No, wait. Leave it, I love that movie...)

My point (I know, shocking, I have a point) is this: In real life, the quirky, creative, wierd misfit girl does NOT get the cool, handsome popular guy. Or, maybe they do and I'm just a little beat up emotionally today and Pretty in Pink on TV makes me think that it isn't fair because I wanted to make my own clothes and have the cool popular rich guy fall in love with me and I wanted a friend like Ducky who would sing to me and care about me and pine away over me.