conversations

1. Yesterday evening it was really warm (for May)(in Calgary)(it was about 25C at 7-ish pm) so I went for a walk down to the St*rb*cks just down the road to get a fr*pp*cino.
I ordered: "Grande Decaf Fr*pp*cino".
The Overly Made Up and Hair-Done (OMUHD) girl at the cash register said back to me: "Grande Decaf Fr*pp*cino?" She then turned to the B*rista behind her and repeated: "Grande Decaf Cappucino."
"Fr*pp*cino", I corrected.
"Right, Cappucino." OMUHD asserted.
I corrected again: "No, Fr*pp*cino."
OMUHD looked confused and said (to me): "Fr*pp*cino?" At my assurance that this was correct, she turned back to B*rista girl and said "Fr*pp*cino. Right. Grande Fr*pp*cino."
I reminded OMUHD of the "Decaf" portion of the order. She turned, once again to the B*rista girl and said "Grande Decaf Cappucino I mean Fr*pp*cino."
That established, it was B*rista girl's turn to be confused.
"Decaf?" she asked. "We don't have Decaf."
There was then a brief discussion between B*rista and Overly Made Up and Hair-Done (OMUHD) girl about the availability of the Decaf (whatever it is they needed. I missed that part). OMUHD turned back to me and told me that they couldn't do a decaf Fr*pp*cino. I asked her why not and got a long story about the missing (whatever it is). OMUHD had the look of a trapped (overly made up and hair-done) deer as she tried to find a solution for me.
"We have Regular and Coffee Lite."
"What is 'Coffee Lite'?" I asked, trying to figure out how that could be a substitute for decaf.
"Well, um. It's lighter. Like it has less calories?"

2. This afternoon at work, a coworker stood behind me for 5 minutes not saying anything. I finally realized she must be there to talk to me, so I asked her "Are you waiting for me?"
"Yes," she said. "I didn't want to bother you."
So I assured her she wasn't bothering me and asked what I could do to help.
"Do you have any undone paperwork for the City?" she asked.
"Like pending invoices?" I asked her.
"No, invoices you haven't done yet." she corrected in the sort of tone one uses with small children.
I told her I didn't have anything for her so she went to find out what was going on. Later, she came back to me with some paperwork that needed to be invoiced.
I asked her, "Do you need me to enter that?" indicating the paperwork in her hand.
"No," she replied. "You just need to enter this," also indicating the paperwork in her hand.